What an idea!!

Indian TV Spot Ad 2006

"don't keep it short"

Taking a sick leave

Phone bill

The phone bill was exceptionally high and the man of the house called a family meeting.

Dad: People this is unacceptable. You have to limit the use of the phone. I do not use this phone, I use the one at the office.

Mum: Same here, I hardly use this home telephone as I use my work telephone

Son: Me too, I never use the home phone. I always use my company mobile

Maid: So what is the problem? We all use our work telephones!!

Classic Definitions & Cool Meanings

1. Cigarette : A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end &a fool at the other.
2. Love affairs : Something like cricket where one-day internationalsare more popular than a five day test.
3. Marriage : It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degreeand a woman gains her master
4. Divorce : Future tense of marriage
5. Lecture : An art of transferring information from the notes of thelecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the mindsof either".
6. Conference : The confusion of one man multiplied by the numberpresent.
7. Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybodybelieves he got the biggest piece.
8. Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeatedby feminine water-power ..
9. Dictionary : A place where divorce comes before marriage.
10. Conference Room : A place where everybody talks, nobody listens &everybody disagrees later on.
11. Ecstasy : A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feelingyou have never felt before.
12. Classic : A book which people praise, but do not read.
13. Smile : A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
14. Office : A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
15. Yawn : The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
16. Etc. : A sign to make others believe that you know more than you
17. Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sittodecide that nothing can be done together.
18. Experience : The name men give to their mistakes.
19. Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.
20. Philosopher : A fool who torments himself during life, to be spokenof when dead.
21. Diplomat : A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way thatyou actually look forward to the trip.
22. Opportunist : A person who starts taking bath if he accidentallyfalls into a river.
23. Optimist : A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says inmidway "See I am not injured yet."
24. Pessimist :- A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO,Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY.
25. Miser : A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.
26. Father : A banker provided by nature.
27. Criminal : A guy no different from the rest... except that he gotcaught.
28. Boss : Someone who is early when you are late and late when you areearly.
29. Politician : One who shakes your hand before elections and yourConfidence after.
30. Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you withhis bills.
31. Software Engineer : One who gets paid for reading and forwardingsuch mails...

I like the way u r thinkin!!

A teacher in a mathematics period asks a 3rd std class," If there are 3 birds on a tree and u shoot one of them,how many birds would remain?? ".Johnny,the nuaghtiest of the lot, shoots up his hand.
teacher: "ok johnny ,wats the answer?". Johnny: "none,ma'am. teacher: "how?" Johnny:" after hearing the shot ,all the other birds will also fly away." Teacher:"no johnny, the answer here is 2,but I like the way u r thinkin.

now johnny has a doubt.
Johhny: " teacher can i ask u a question? Teacher: "sure" johnny:" there are three ladies havin ice cream at the parlour. the first one is eatin it,the second is lickin it while the third one is suckin on it.can u tell which one of the ladies is married??"
teacher is terribly embaressed,but she puts on a brave face and answers.
Teacher: "I....I......I guess the one which is suckin on the ice cream is married."Johnny:" no ma'am,the one who has the wedding ring on her finger is married,BUT I LIKE THE WAY U R THINKIN." !!!!!